bittersweet milestone on the horizon

Unless we’re blessed with a surprise baby someday, sometime this week, I’ll nurse my last baby for the last time.

It’s a bittersweet milestone, one heavily laden in emotions.

Memories of the sheer frustration of early nursing sessions where I cried my eyes out because he wouldn’t latch and stay awake, his little body fragile and unfamiliar to me … to a morning like this morning, where I can tell when my milk has let down by how his suckling changes — from frantic suckles to even, nutritive draws while he tucks his legs up to his belly and buries his face deep into the curve of my chest.

We’ve fallen into a nice rhythm … and it pains me to know it’s me whose making the decision to stop.

Continue reading “bittersweet milestone on the horizon”

Tuesday Musings

A friend of mine from college posted this New York Times article on Facebook today (Being a Working Mother Means Always Having to Say You’re Sorry) and as I read it, all I could do was nod.

The fact that I was nodding the whole time both saddened and infuriated me.

It saddened me because of how true it is … and infuriated me because it shouldn’t be this way. We shouldn’t have to feel the need to apologize for making choices that put our children first!  Continue reading “Tuesday Musings”

The Maternity Leave “Vacation”

Allow me to break some news: maternity leave is by no means a vacation.

Of course, anyone who has been on maternity leave knows this … but as a newbie with Maya, I didn’t know.

The notion of (up to) twelve weeks off work sounds really appealing when you’re massively pregnant and sick of life as you know it. It sounds like a vacation: everyone knows babies sleep a ton, so clearly there will be all this “free time,” you think. Time to focus on all the things you can’t get done during the normal work-week or weekends. Continue reading “The Maternity Leave “Vacation””

Time, Time, Time

Today over lunch a couple mommy friends and I were answering questions from a pregnant friend about the whole elusive work/life balance. We told her it’s so cliched but so true … pretty much everything changes when you have kids … even for people who genuinely didn’t expect it to. Which means something has to give if you want to maintain happiness in spite of said changes. Continue reading “Time, Time, Time”

The ‘Busy’ Trap

I read this N.Y. Times article today that really hit home called “The ‘Busy’ Trap.”

While I don’t feel like I’m someone who always immediately responds that I’m ‘so busy,’ when asked how I’m doing, it’s certainly something I hear a lot — even people I just met at the conference I attended talked about this.

Like the article said, it’s like a badge of honor in some circles to be ‘so busy’ — and I sometimes feel guilty for not being as busy as others; as though by not being ‘so busy’ my work isn’t valued. But that isn’t true, either. Continue reading “The ‘Busy’ Trap”

There is No “Right” or “Wrong” — Only What Works for *YOU* (for now, that is …)

Cozy up … this is a long one. 🙂

In spite of her warning, with an open mind, I read my friend Jodie’s recent blog post about being a stay at home mom, in which she writes,

“I have no idea what the @#@! we have done to ourselves in this country, but we’ve gotten to a point where we have kids, simply to say, “Great! Now who can I pay to take care of them so I can go back to work?” As if kids fit perfectly into our life pockets without making any sacrifices to the size and shape of the pocket.”

At first glance I was, as she cautioned some of her readers would be, a little pissed off. I’m a working mom who does, as she says, “pays someone else to take care of” my kid.

But then as I read it again, I felt sad — and then guilty … which made me feel even worse.

You see, for as much as I miss Maya during the day — and believe me, it’s more than I could ever express here — I work out of choice … not necessity. Continue reading “There is No “Right” or “Wrong” — Only What Works for *YOU* (for now, that is …)”

LIVE YOUR DREAMS

Today’s post by Kate about going “unplugged” and not feeling like blogging much lately really hit home, as I, too, have been struggling with an overall feeling of just wanting to live vs. document what I’m living, so to speak.

Her post also reminded me of the message from this image (above). You’ve probably seen it floating around the interwebs, so forgive me for inundating you with it yet again — but I just love it and think it’s worth repeating.

Continue reading “LIVE YOUR DREAMS”