My Body: Not So Shiny and New…

boingboing.net. All shiny and new!
Image credit: boingboing.net. All shiny and new!
When I made the decision to lose weight back in 2004, I went at it with absolute gusto — and I did it.

Perhaps because it was my first attempt ever at trying to lose, it worked like a charm.
I felt amazing. Incredible. Skinny, even. (Technically, I never was “skinny” but you know what I mean; I felt it).

As I “found” hidden body parts that now were much clearer on my leaner frame (ribs, hip bones, collar bones), I thought I was ‘da bomb.

I could work out longer. I was rarely sick. My clothes started falling off. A solid 14/12 depending on the store, I pretty much skipped the 10s and 8s and went right into 6s and sometimes, a 4. It was constant change for eight months.

But now that I’ve more or less been in this body (with some added padding) for four+ years, it’s hard to feel that “high” I felt back in the beginning.

I’ve been blaming it on the fact that I’ve put on about 7-10 lbs. from my lowest, but the truth is, that “low” might not have been maintainable in the long haul (without too much extra work). And even more than that … the shininess of my transformed body has just worn off. It’s not new anymore. Continue reading “My Body: Not So Shiny and New…”

“Happy” Weight Vs. “Fighting Weight”

Call it the weight loss/maintenance limbo: “How low are you willing to go?”

A couple months ago, SELF magazine had an article/quiz about finding your “happy” weight.

I had to laugh when it said my “happy weight” was 135, which ironically, had been my original WW goal.

HA.

Their idea of a “happy weight” is my idea of a “fighting weight,” a weight that I might not reach without serious deprivation or over-exercising … and even if I got there, it wouldn’t necessarily be maintainable in the long-term.

How do I know this? Well, the truth is (shhhh!!!), the lowest I ever got on Weight Watchers (on my old scale) was 138.4 (Note: on my new scale I never saw below 144).

I saw that “beautiful 138.4” twice, and nearly cried for joy seeing a “3” in my stats (though in reality it was probably not accurate).

And you know what? Both times I shot up to 142 the following week. At the time, I didn’t understand it. Until then, I’d been losing steadily, so why did I hit that wall? Continue reading ““Happy” Weight Vs. “Fighting Weight””