“With Bump, Not Plump”

It’s no surprise that over the past year or two, I’ve gained some weight.

Though it sucks to admit it, I’ve been quite honest about that here on the blog because, well, this is my place to talk about that stuff … for better or worse. 😉

Even with stopping the nasty chewing and spitting behaviors of the past and gaining a much healthier relationship with both food and exercise (yea!), I was never able to re-lose the weight I’d hoped to.

It seems I finally reached that “set point” where my body was content and it didn’t require a helluva lot of effort to maintain … (Amen!). I’ve come to accept that we all have our own “set points,” and for some women that is much higher or lower than other women — and there’s no point in comparing. (Double amen!)

This has been well and good for the past year or so … The thing is, now I’m in that awkward in-between phase where 1) we haven’t told a ton of people yet that we’re expecting (just close friends and family and obviously you, my readers!) and where 2) I don’t have a visible bump yet … but just look/feel thick. Continue reading ““With Bump, Not Plump””

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Facing Reality

One of the positives about always being heavy is you never really “gain weight” — you just are always “big.” There’s no yo-yoing, no four sizes of clothes in your closet that all could fit on a day’s notice.

I’ve never experienced the whole “tight clothes dilemma” … or needing to buy new things … until now. Now my body dysmorphia (when I lost weight and was “thin” and still thought I was fat) has turned into full fledged reality; no, I don’t mean to imply I’m fat, but I’m uncomfortably chunky at the moment.

Over the past two years or so, sure, I’ve had to move certain things to the back of my closet; even skinny people experience this from time to time. (Those white capris from the summer of 2005, for example. At my thinnest, they fit perfectly but now? HA.)

But for the most part, I have been able to wear almost everything I used to wear. Until now. Continue reading “Facing Reality”