Combating Emotional Eating … Hmmm, No Thanks.

It shouldn’t surprise anyone — as I’ve discussed it here before on numerous occasions — but for as far as I’ve come in my journey and relationship with food, I’m still an emotional eater. Yes, I just admitted that.  That  issue hasn’t gone away.

The difference is now, I just manage it better … i.e., I move on. I don’t over-exercise to compensate, I don’t restrict to compensate, I don’t berate myself to compensate, and I don’t talk about food  incessantly to compensate. Continue reading “Combating Emotional Eating … Hmmm, No Thanks.”

Entitlement Eating

There’s intuitive eating, which can be defined as rejecting the diet mentality, listening to your body and honoring hunger cues to eat as intuitively as possible. Infants and toddlers are excellent intuitive eaters … and somewhere along the way, people like me have lost our ability to eat intuitively. (I blogged about this at Babble.com a couple months ago). 

We need a reset button in order to re-learn how to eat in this manner. Continue reading “Entitlement Eating”

Eating Bender — STOP THE INSANITY!

Confession: I’ve been on an eating bender for the past few months. Between vacations (Jamaica, Massachusetts, Mexico City), work events, meals out, date night … I’ve been a little piggy.

All the things I know I don’t need, know I can do without … I’ve given into them all … and all at once. Where I’d usually stop at one piece of chocolate, I eat four. Where I’d usually ignore store-bought cookies (not worth the calories), I’ve succumbed to their sugar-laden glory. Where I’d maybe share a few bites of dessert out, I go half-sies.

And it makes me feel crappy. Tired. Unhappy. Disappointed in myself for my lack of self-control or care. Continue reading “Eating Bender — STOP THE INSANITY!”

My Latest Babble.com Post is Up!

Happy 17 months, Maya! 🙂

Truly, watching my daughter eat has been one of the most eye-opening experiences of motherhood to date.

I wrote this post for Babble.com about how watching a toddler can give deep insight into how to eat intuitively. Check it out here: Want to Learn How To Eat Intuitively? Spend a Day with a Toddler (or below the jump).

Continue reading “My Latest Babble.com Post is Up!”

“Little Baby is Watching”

Tonight started out innocently enough.

Maya was in her high-chair, happily eating bite-sized pieces of cucumber and a few chopped up pieces of mac-n-cheese for dinner. We eat after she goes to bed, but I was hungry too. So I opened the fridge to find a healthy snack … and, found myself with the can of Reddi-Wip.

[Insert Jaws soundtrack here] Continue reading ““Little Baby is Watching””

Food Evolutions

Now that Maya is starting to eat solids (rice cereal with her 10 AM feeding — soon to be coupled with fruit; a veggie with her 4 PM feeding; a little more cereal with her 7 PM feeding), a whole new world has opened up for our family.

Watching her slurp up her solids (and getting them ALL over her face or all over ME when she blows raspberries with a full mouth [manners will come later!]), attempt to “chew” with her gums, and open her little birdie mouth for the spoon (it’s the cutest thing!) I got to thinking about how my own relationship with food has evolved since my infancy.

I’ve said before that my disordered habits didn’t begin til 2005, a year AFTER I lost weight on Weight Watchers. But looking back at my food history, I noticed there were some not-so-obvious hints at a future problem.

I could sum my evolution in seven phases: Childhood (ages 0-13), High School, College, Weight Watchers, Borderline Orthorexia, Chewing/Spitting, Pregnancy, and Now. Continue reading “Food Evolutions”

Flying Solo

My husband is an engineer during the day and an MBA student at night who regularly travels 90 miles to and from Ann Arbor twice a week for class.

It’s kind of insane, but totally worth it. We’re hoping his MBA will give us new opportunities to explore as a family — but I’m not gonna lie … it’s a sacrifice on many levels.

He misses a lot of fun social events and spends a lot of time studying, on group conference calls, and preparing presentations. It’s been hard on me not having him around as much as I’d have liked the past few years, but he graduates this December so we can finally see the light.

We knew having a baby while he’s still in school would not be easy. So without me even suggesting it, he opted to just take one course this semester (so he could be home more with me and Maya) and then do this week-long class in Washington, D.C. that would be the same amount of credits as a usual class. This sounded like a genius idea at the time.

Until this week, when it wasn’t. Continue reading “Flying Solo”

The Evil Binge Monster & Random Thoughts About Running

I’ve often said “awareness is half the battle” when it came to my disordered eating recovery process.

But the past two weeks — in spite of being painfully aware that I’ve been over-eating — or this past weekend, when I just gave in to emotional eating, period (borderlining on binges) — all the awareness in the world — even recognizing the “why” — hasn’t helped me stop.

I’m not channeling the CBT techniques I learned in therapy, like trying to occupy myself with other thoughts or doing something else when the impulse to eat strikes — recognizing food won’t fill a void but rather is just anesthetizing me to whatever I’m feeling, as Kara DioGuardi noted in this month’s Women’s Health cover story.

I’m basically just giving into the orange binge monster (WW’s adorable mascot) whatever, whenever. And it’s ugly. Continue reading “The Evil Binge Monster & Random Thoughts About Running”

Shrouding: Disordered or Not?

Heather’s recent post, “Helpful Hint or Disordered Eating” at Hangry Pants really got me thinking …

As Heather notes in her post, “For some time we’ve debated food destruction – ruining your food with something like salt or hot sauce so that it is inedible. Jillian Michaels pours candle wax on her food (thanks for the link Julie) when she is full, and instructs Biggest Loser players to destroy desserts with salt.”

While I think Jillian’s solution is on the extreme side, it saddens me to admit it’s not something I couldn’t have imagined myself doing back in the day of peak disorderedness.

Sad but true.

Continue reading “Shrouding: Disordered or Not?”

Food Revolution & The Obesity Crisis in America

I feel like it’s been eons since I wrote a blog post, but last night we caught Jamie Oliver on Campbell Brown on CNN, plugging his new show, Food Revolution and I was fully inspired to write.

Though we didn’t see the actual 2-hour premier (got home too late for that) we saw the segment with the mom from W. Va. who has her fridge/freezer unloaded by Jamie.

Staring at the disgusting-looking pile of junk food and frozen pizzas and chicken nuggets and lord knows what else … he basically tells the mom (who is overweight, if not obese) that eating this way is basically killing her and her children, cutting their lives short by 14 years or so.

When you see the tears start to well up in her face, it’s hard not to be moved to tears yourself. My husband and I just sat there, stunned, looking at the TV. Continue reading “Food Revolution & The Obesity Crisis in America”