Hi, My Name is Pseudo-Sally, in Recovery

Friends and family alike have always teased me about being a picky eater.

Long before my disordered eating issues began, I was a picky eater, often related to my body’s intolerance to certain foods (I have I.B.S. which flares up with creamy foods, tomato-based foods, etc.)

And once I joined Weight Watchers in 2004, and began paying closer attention to what I ate, the I.B.S. flare-ups subsided (although not entirely).

Then, as I learned more about nutrition … I became even more picky/selectively restrictive, for different reasons (i.e., disordered ones). Continue reading “Hi, My Name is Pseudo-Sally, in Recovery”


Girls and Dieting, Then and Now

tweensWhen two people share the same article with you and offer it as a topic for your blog, as a blogger, you take it and run with it.

This Wall Street Journal article, Girls and Dieting, Then and Now, came to my attention by Lara and Sarah.

An excerpt:

One day in January 1986, fourth-grade girls at Marie Murphy School in Wilmette, Ill., were called down to the principal’s office.

A stranger was waiting there to ask each girl a question: “Are you on a diet?”

Most of the girls said they were.

“I just want to be skinny so no one will tease me,” explained Sara Totonchi.

“Boys expect girls to be perfect and beautiful,” said Rozi Bhimani. “And skinny.” Continue reading “Girls and Dieting, Then and Now”

“… But I Don’t Wanna…!

How I'm feeling ...
How I'm feeling ...
Giving more thought to yesterday’s all-over-the-place post, I’m realizing what it comes down to is this: I hate the thought of “dieting” to lose weight.

To quote my two-year old self, “I don’t wanna!”

“Dieting” goes against everything I felt about Weight Watchers; I always told people “it’s a way of life” and tried to make the distinction at every opportunity.

The truth is, if I’m going to cut 500 calories a day to lose a pound a week, I would much rather do it through exercise like I do now.

However unrealistic it is, I’d rather work out hard every single day for the rest of my life — than “diet” or not give in to momentary cravings/impulses/desires.

And that is what’s hurting me, what I’m eating … even though it’s journaled, even though it’s measured … it’s still too much — especially since I’ve been eating some of my activity points as of late.

It’s too much to lose. Continue reading ““… But I Don’t Wanna…!“”

Cool, Calm & Collected

cucumber-slices1Sometimes it just takes a nudge to get us moving again towards a goal.

I remember that feeling of being paralyzed about mid-way through my senior year of college.

I didn’t have a job lined up for after graduation, I
knew my then-boyfriend (now husband) was moving overseas after graduation to fulfill his military obligation in his home country, and my friends were all making their plans to spread out around the country.

I felt alone, lost and uneasy–fairly natural for most co-eds about to be tossed into the “real world.” I wanted to stay in D.C. but my internship at U.S. News & World Report wasn’t going to last past May, and even if I stayed, where would I live if all my best friends were leaving?! Continue reading “Cool, Calm & Collected”

Disordered Eating: It’s Not Just a “She” Thing …

How's that for a morning jolt?!
How's that for a morning jolt?!
How many males do you know that suffer from body image issues or body dysmorphia?

How many guys do you know are “on a diet?”

My guess (before today) is … not many.

Your guy might work out regularly and drink protein shakes… he might moan about his gut … and he might even eat oatmeal for breakfast (followed by a burger and fries at lunch).

But chances are, he’s not counting every calorie he eats or obsessing over every calorie he torches at the gym.

At least, that’s pretty much what I’d thought, too … until I read this article. Continue reading “Disordered Eating: It’s Not Just a “She” Thing …”

Diet: A Dirty Four-Letter Word

Image credit: lifedynamix.com
There are many words in the English language that I don’t like.

Topping the list is the word “diet.”

In its truest form, “diet” simply refers to what we eat.

From the Webster’s: diet –noun 1. food and drink considered in terms of its qualities, composition, and its effects on health: Milk is a wholesome article of diet.

2. a particular selection of food, esp. as designed or prescribed to improve a person’s physical condition or to prevent or treat a disease: a diet low in sugar.

I know I use the word in both those ways.

However, one could also argue I also use it in the third sense of the word: 3. such a selection or a limitation on the amount a person eats for reducing weight. Continue reading “Diet: A Dirty Four-Letter Word”

“Happy” Weight Vs. “Fighting Weight”

Call it the weight loss/maintenance limbo: “How low are you willing to go?”

A couple months ago, SELF magazine had an article/quiz about finding your “happy” weight.

I had to laugh when it said my “happy weight” was 135, which ironically, had been my original WW goal.


Their idea of a “happy weight” is my idea of a “fighting weight,” a weight that I might not reach without serious deprivation or over-exercising … and even if I got there, it wouldn’t necessarily be maintainable in the long-term.

How do I know this? Well, the truth is (shhhh!!!), the lowest I ever got on Weight Watchers (on my old scale) was 138.4 (Note: on my new scale I never saw below 144).

I saw that “beautiful 138.4” twice, and nearly cried for joy seeing a “3” in my stats (though in reality it was probably not accurate).

And you know what? Both times I shot up to 142 the following week. At the time, I didn’t understand it. Until then, I’d been losing steadily, so why did I hit that wall? Continue reading ““Happy” Weight Vs. “Fighting Weight””