Be All That You Can Be.

Today, as I sat at work eating mini Reese’s peanut butter cups on autopilot (taking a little nibble and tossing them, one by one) and docking the Points one by one, feeling like a temporary failure (knowing HELLO, I shouldn’t have bought them in the first place, let alone brought them in to the office, as they’re a trigger food …) I couldn’t help but wonder …

Doesn’t everyone want to be the best they can be?

Or is it just a few of us in this world that set really high expectations for ourselves and feel disappointed in ourselves when we “screw up?”

I don’t think it’s a crazy question to ask — with respect to recovery or life more generally. I think it’s human nature to want to be the best version of ourselves we can be. Continue reading “Be All That You Can Be.”

Me & Chex Mix = :(

(Note: no photo/image on purpose … must avoid this crack at all costs!)

Chex mix and I have a VERY abusive relationship.

The past few weeks, for reasons unbeknown to me, I’ve been ridiculously buying Chex mix (cheddar, honey nut, or most recently — the special edition cocoa!).

Chex mix which doesn’t fill me, is a waste of calories/Points, and leaves me always wanting more. I think it should be called Crack mix. Continue reading “Me & Chex Mix = :(“

The Party’s Over … or Just Beginning?

party-hatRoughly four weeks ago I decided that I was in control of my chewing and spitting behavior and that I could, indeed, CHOOSE not to do it. That I could be proud of my choices, not feel guilty for them.

In the two weeks that followed, I found myself over-eating on foods I used to chew/spit … and over-exercising. (I don’t share a recap of my days here like some bloggers do, but that’s the honest truth).

This past week, my exercise was more normalized, and I didn’t buy quite as many triggers. I also took a rest day (and will tomorrow, a travel day) … but I have been still eating more than I need to (for someone who still wants to lose weight and get back to where I feel my best).

Mostly, it’s been giving in to that-time-of-the-month cravings (which ends today, phew!), not flexing my resistance muscle, and just plain enjoying more than usual … (which isn’t such a bad thing, if I were able to be happy with my figure as it is … some days I am, other days … I’m not … call me Goldilocks, looking for something that’s juuuuuuuuuuuust right).

But as I’ve noted here, I’ve also eaten chocolate in the privacy of my car or at my work cufice that I know I just don’t need — and the secretive, sneaky way I do it … I wouldn’t want my friends, coworkers, husband, family to see. It’s embarassing.

So it is my hope that this coming week, I’ll finally see growth, evidence of that happy medium. Continue reading “The Party’s Over … or Just Beginning?”