Rushing for Nothing

I’ve blogged ad nauseam about my anxiety issues over the years. It’s no surprise that, while I try — maybe too hard? — to live in the moment, my brain is still always thinking ten steps ahead. In some instances that can be a benefit. But in others, it isn’t so great.

Lately my anxiety has (stupidly) stemmed from Ben not walking. I know, I know … kids walk and talk and all that when they are ready. I know Maya didn’t walk til 13 months (where Ben is now). And I know all kids are different.

But I have been so focused on Ben not walking that I missed some other super-awesome things he can do now. In the past month or two, he waves bye whenever leaving the room (or if someone else does); climbs on furniture; can climb up stairs (and semi-scoots down with assistance); he throws balls with such dexterity that there’s no way he’s my kid; dances — like bops and shakes his head side to side; puts a “phone” to his ear and “talking” when he hears a phone ring on TV or at home; and he blows kisses — to name a few. Continue reading “Rushing for Nothing”

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fading memories

I breathe in his freshly-shampooed hair, twirling the fine baby-soft strands of blonde sweetness around my finger. Ben has been asleep in my arms for close to 20 minutes now, but I’ve selfishly (?) stayed upstairs in the nursery rocking him, snuggling him close and savoring the night-time quiet — his even breathing and the pitter-patter of his heart-beat while Luis prepares Maya for bed.

He’s limp in my arms, in such a deep sleep he’s easily placed into his crib and I do the “hand slip” out from under him. He moans a little, lets out a sigh as he drifts into dreamland. I touch his back, rubbing it ever-so-softly, making shushing sounds, while his legs curl under him.

And, as I did a million times with Baby Maya, I stop and pause to reflect on this.exact.moment. Continue reading “fading memories”

Why I’m Glad We Went the Puppy-Then-Baby Route: 12 Similarities Between Fur-Babies and Real Babies

Double trouble. Literally.

Note: I originally wrote this for Babble but it didn’t make the cut; they had too many similar pieces … so if you know of another publication looking for similar freelance pieces … let me know! In the meantime, I thought I’d share with my own readers! 🙂

I’d wanted a puppy for a long time. With my husband chiseling away at his evening MBA (which entailed driving to the other side of the state after work several times a week as well as some weekends), I was lonely.

Though we both wanted to start a family, we were in a holding pattern until he had finished his MBA. A puppy seemed like the answer to my loneliness and desire to be a mom: he/she could keep me company and give me something to satiate my maternal calling.

Rocco came into our lives in the form of an email from a coworker whose Lab had just had puppies – puppies they couldn’t possibly keep. It was love at first sight. All paws, he came bounding over to us, wagging his teensy nub of a tail and licking our hands. I scooped him in my arms and just knew he’d be our forever friend. Only eight pounds at the time, he was a little peanut who crashed in my lap on the long drive home – but you could just tell he was going to be all Lab: full of boundless energy. Continue reading “Why I’m Glad We Went the Puppy-Then-Baby Route: 12 Similarities Between Fur-Babies and Real Babies”

Seconds

One of my biggest fears about having a daughter has been passing along my food issues to her. Though I’m long past my dark days of disordered eating, I still think a lot about food and fitness quite a bit (and still journal) and though they don’t plague me, I still emotionally eat from time to time and still have “fat” days. Even though I know I’m not actually “fat,” I certainly have some weight to lose to get to my feel-best weight/size and I will eventually …

[Sadly, even an upcoming Caribbean trip this spring isn’t enough to get me to the gym regularly again and off the sweets. <<Sigh>> One of these days I’ll get it together…]

Anyway, yesterday I had to catch myself when I saw Maya’s daily log at school. Continue reading “Seconds”

Snug as a Bug in a Rug

Some of my earliest childhood memories involve being in the car and falling asleep. When we’d arrive home, my dad would pick me up and put me in my bed and tuck me in, “snug as a bug in a rug.”

When I got too old to be carried, envious of my younger (smaller) siblings, I’d pretend to be asleep just to keep our little ritual going. To this day, I don’t know if he knew I was pretending from about age seven on … but those are some of my favorite memories. To a child, there is truly nothing like the safety of your parents’ arms.

I was thinking about that tonight when I was rocking Maya to sleep, her little exhausted body rendered limp in my arms. Every parent knows that putting a sleeping baby in a crib can yield one of two results. Continue reading “Snug as a Bug in a Rug”

Tune in to yourself … like a baby

We can learn a lot from watching babies.

Babies, who can’t express themselves in any ways except crying and smiling (at least in the beginning, before they can communicate via expressions and words) are incredibly attuned to their needs … and once those needs are met, they move on. They eat til they’re full, sleep til they’re not tired, stop playing when they’re bored … They don’t dwell, there’s no guilt, there’s no nothing except the here and now.

[Until three hours later when another need arises, that is!]

They are so absolutely in tune with their own bodies that it’s almost mind-blowing that we adults (who live in a world of excess food and minimal sleep, who play Words with Friends instead of hitting the hay even though we are bone-tired … ) need to retrain ourselves to get back to that place of primitiveness and simplicity. Continue reading “Tune in to yourself … like a baby”

The Breast Milk Baby??

There’s a new doll on the market, and she doesn’t pee or cry or sneeze or spit-up like other dolls that have made their way on the market. Nope, this baby suckles. Like a real baby!

And little kids  around the world can buy this doll, the Breast Milk Baby, and experience what their own mothers experienced when they were babies.

The baby comes with a little smock (reminiscent of a nursing cover except in this case the baby latches to the outside) and the baby sucks away.

While this doll is shocking in America where breastfeeding is still taboo (stupidly so, if you ask me), it’s being embraced in other parts of the world for its real replication of a very natural human act … an act for women of child-bearing age, that is.

Continue reading “The Breast Milk Baby??”