Tag: anorexia

Feeling Hunger

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highres_2601663Yesterday I fasted for Yom Kippur, and it never ceases to amaze me – if I actually allow myself to feel hungry (vs fearing it) – how good it feels.

Now please know,  I am not endorsing deliberate starvation by any stretch of the imagination; this is a once-a-year fast that I do in observance of my religion on the holiest day of the year.

A day (24 hrs, sundown to sundown) of fasting showed me that the human body is a complicated thing, and I think in a way, it helped reset my hunger queues; helped teach me what true hunger is. Continue reading “Feeling Hunger” →

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Michael Jackson–Was He Anorexic?

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I read an interesting article over at Beautiful Without Consquence this weekend which raised the question of whether or not anorexia played a role in Michael Jackson’s untimely death.

While he always looked painfully skinny to me, I hadn’t heard much about that suspicion until now.

But then today on the Huffington Post, I found a second article that brought up the very same suspicion.

I’m no expert, but I wouldn’t be surprised if the autopsy/toxicology reports will show a combination of malnutrition, various illnesses and over-medication/over-reliance on prescription drugs contributed to his death. Continue reading “Michael Jackson–Was He Anorexic?” →

My Interview at Beautiful Without Consequence

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Egg Beaten Angel, who blogs at Beautiful Without Consequence, recently contacted me about doing an interview on her recovery blog.

She is four months into her own recovery, and an inspiration to others fighting DE/ED/ED-NOS. I was flattered and honored to answer her questions; her blog’s motto is “I’m Still Fighting!” and I admire her strength.

You can read my interview and her and post-interview commentary here.

Thanks for the opportunity, Angel!!

After the jump is a transcript of my interview (for my own records) Continue reading “My Interview at Beautiful Without Consequence” →

Book Review: You’d Be So Pretty If … 

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bookcoverI don’t have a daughter — let alone a pre-teen daughter– yet. But if I did, you can bet I’d be reading Dara Chadwick’s You’d Be So Pretty If ….

In fact, I’ll make sure to keep my copy on hand for when the time comes, because I believe it will come in handy.

In a quick synopsis, it’s a book that explores body image and the critical relationship between mothers and daughters — particularly during the tricky pre-teen years — and how our behaviors and how we carry ourselves as women is passed on to our daughters.

A fast-moving book, it reads as part memoir and part how-to-guide.

Chadwick explores the challenges she faced undergoing her transformation as SHAPE magazine’s Weight Loss Diarist in 2007. Continue reading “Book Review: You’d Be So Pretty If … “ →

Passing Judgment

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gavel1Note: This post is all over the place and content-heavy, so … consider it a stream of consciousness and please bear with me.

My post last Friday about the evidently malnourished Australian Miss Universe contestant got me thinking about judgment … specifically, my unconsious (human?) tendency to pass judgment.

I called this woman out here on my blog — a disordered eating recovery blog — for being too skinny (at 5’11 and 108 lbs.) and for possibly having an eating disorder … in spite of her denial of it being true.

I called her out because in looking at her, I was concerned that this is the image our children see.

I called her out because I was both sickened and saddened — sickened that she looked so skeletal, and saddened that her figure personifies “beauty” to some … possibly even some of my own readers or followers of “thinspo” (the pro-ana movement).

The irony is, if I saw a morbidly obese person on the street, who might not be in the best health either, though I might make a superficial judgment in my head (as in, stating the fact that the person is morbidly obese) … would I devote a post about it?

No, I wouldn’t. Continue reading “Passing Judgment” →

Beating Ana: The Long-Awaited Review

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mailA while ago, I was asked to review the new book, Beating Ana, by Shannon Cutts. This weekend, I finally had a chance to read her work.

Though I personally have never experienced anorexia or bulimia — both of which she successfully recovered from — I really liked the easy flow of her writing, and the positive tone she carries throughout the book.

(Disclaimer: I’ve never read a recovery book, so I honestly didn’t know what to expect).

But even as someone who never dealt with the severe mental illnesses she did, I can still relate on my own level. I’d recommend this book to anyone ready to take that step.

I liked how she makes the connection that, in recovery, relationships replace eating disorders. Continue reading “Beating Ana: The Long-Awaited Review” →

THIN: The HBO Documentary

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thin-posterA part of me fears the following post might be too sensitive or hit too close to home for some readers. I say this because I know my audience ranges from people without any eating disorders and weight issues; people with eating disorders and weight issues; people trying to lose weight; people who have lost weight and kept it off; disordered eaters … friends, family … my readership is all over the place and I love the variety.

I deeply respect and admire the women in this film who sought help, whether it was for the first time or the fifteenth time … and I wish everyone with an ED could do the same: get help. It takes a ton of courage to make that call or visit, and so I have utmost respect for these ladies. And so the readers I’m mostly concerned about in this post are those currently in the throes of their eating disorders; I don’t want to upset anyone — hence today’s pre-post note.

Personally, I don’t know what it’s like to starve myself, and I don’t know what it’s like to binge or purge … I don’t pretend to know what it’s like; for all my disordered eating behaviors, I’ve never dealt with anorexia or bulimia. Though I am coming at this film more as someone perpetually struggling with her weight/body acceptance more than as someone with a clinical eating disorder, I do realize just how serious these diseases are.

Please know I’m not judging anyone; I simply care. My blog is about transparency and being honest, and I can’t sugarcoat how I felt after seeing something so moving.

That said, here is my review of the HBO documentary THIN (2006) which I finally saw for the first time Wednesday night. Continue reading “THIN: The HBO Documentary” →

Social Networking & Pro-Ana Groups

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Like many of us, I have a Facebook account, and use it to keep in touch with friends and family. Three weeks ago, I (boldly) included my blog on my profile, with the knowledge that anyone could take a look — part of my desire to live authentically.

Maybe I’m naïve, but I didn’t know what else Facebook was being used for until I came across this article in Newsweek titled “Pro-Anorexia Groups Spread to Facebook”.

Having just read Perfect Girls, Starving Daughters and having just met MamaV, who works to raise awareness about these online communities, I was particularly intrigued at what is happening in the social media sphere.

Intrigued and saddened, I should note. Continue reading “Social Networking & Pro-Ana Groups” →

Blurring the Lines: Eating Disorders and Disordered Eating

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photoshop-windy-colored-wavy-shear-windWhen I began blogging, I always considered being a disordered eater a separate entity from having an eating disorder.

After all, every woman seems to be a “disordered eater” in one way or another.

And since I never truly binged; never binged and purged (I cry when I throw up; last time was alcohol-induced, at a Dave Matthews Band concert back in 1999); and never starved myself, I was “in the clear,” so to speak … at least in my own little head.

I didn’t classify myself with the girls who threw up their lunches or worked out for four hours a day and lived on lettuce leaves.

I had a complex, thinking, “Well, I’d do anything but that …” as though that made me less culpable or something.

In my head, I wasn’t one of “them”. I just exercised a lot and watched every morsel that went into my mouth.

But I mean, really, who was I kidding? I still had a big, undeniable problem. What might sound admirable (being a militant exerciser and keeping a meticulous food journal) was hurting me –and those I love and who love me — in more ways than one. Continue reading “Blurring the Lines: Eating Disorders and Disordered Eating” →