“Normal”

Yesterday I got the combined results of my sequential screening. This is what the letter said:

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“Normal”

The simple word I never heard once during my pregnancy with Maya, I’ve heard now plenty this go-around: from doctors, nurses, ultrasound techs, and now prenatal tests. Granted, Maya turned out just fine.

And I should be elated to hear “normal” …. but there is a part of me that — even after hearing “normal” so many times — still worries. How could I not?! 

I am feeling heightened anxiety right now — between the pregnancy, the impending move (Monday!) and selling our house (please, someone buy!) … and I know I should feel a sense of relief with this news. I just don’t know how you “get past it” following a really scary situation. I guess in the end, I just have to remember we were lucky with Maya and all the testing, scares, and monitoring yielded a healthy, happy baby.

Sometimes it’s just hard to take your head out of the weeds.

Next Wednesday, we’ll get another view of the baby and I think that might help put my mind at ease — at least a smidge. Til then, I’ll just keep on trucking on. I’m gaining weight, my belly is getting rounder, and my back is hurting more and more by the day — so all of those are good signs. Signs I need to trust; have faith in.

After all … hope floats.

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