The Awkward In-Between

Written March 30, 2013 (12 weeks, 4 days)

Unlike so many women you hear about, I love being pregnant and experiencing the changes my body goes through.

With Maya, I hid my pregnancy til I was about 16 or 18 weeks along — and it was relatively easy because I really didn’t show til then. This time, however, I am gaining faster/showing sooner (to the tune of about four weeks sooner!) … as in, before the “safe” point of announcing.

Ugh.

People that know me well, know I am a fitness freak and tend to watch my weight … but I am definitely gaining and now I’m in that terribly awkward phase of looking chunky but not pregnant yet. Double ugh.

It’s not so much that I care what others think — if they want to assume I’ve packed on some winter weight, so be it. The problem is I am not comfortable in anything … except my Lululemon workout gear which — while fabulous — is not work-appropriate!

All my regular clothes are snug — literally, my waist has expanded an inch or two just in the past few weeks — but while I have a lil belly action going on, I am not big enough to fill out any maternity stuff I have from when I was pregnant with Maya. In fact, just tonight I had to return a fabulous dress I’d bought for vacation because, while it looked cute three weeks ago, when I tried it on last night I looked positively awful.

I know once I really pop I will be able to fit into maternity tops and dresses in particular … but in the meantime, it’s time for me to put away my regular jeans and dress pants for the indefinite future and pull out the elastic waistbands and belly paneled-pants.

It’ll all be worth it this fall … just have to keep that in mind while my waist, hops, and butt expand. It really is for the most amazing reason on earth and I am blessed to be experiencing this, period.

How about you? How did you deal with that awkward in-between phase, especially if you’d had body image issues before?

One thought on “The Awkward In-Between

  1. I’m really connecting to your story, even though it’s quite a few years old at this point. 🙂 I’ve always been an obsessive calorie counter (going on 15 years of counting EVERY SINGLE CALORIE eaten – and no, I shouldn’t be proud, but I am). I’m currently 17 weeks pregnant and Im downright depressed at how much I’m eating, even though it’s right in line with where I should be (about 300 calories more than normal). I can’t stop thinking about food. If I’m not eating it, I’m googling recipes or watching endless hours of Instagram food posts. Im just so angry with myself! I even find myself resenting my 2 year old because she just picks at her food – and I end up eating it. I hate the hunger that comes with being pregnant. Hate it! With my firstborn, I was able to eliminate all smack foods from my house and only gained 18 months in the 40 weeks. But with this pregnancy, toddler food is everywhere! Sorry, I got off track. I really just wanted to tell you thank you for sharing your story. And I’m so proud of where you are now and hope I can get there.

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