Odds and Ends

How have I let this much time pass between posts?! Sorry, readers. It’s been quite the crazy couple of weeks around here … hence the mish-mash of thoughts to follow.

Luis was in Germany for a week so I was flying solo and had no time to blog, and then complicating an already stressful week, he got stuck there an extra day and a half. Needless to say, it was a tough week. The kind that makes you not only miss your spouse for who they are (that’s a given), but also the kind of partnership you have in running a family.

We aren’t perfect and lord knows we have our tiffs (both being VERY opinionated!) but we really do have a beautiful thing going on. After a week of playing mom, dad, chauffeur and full-time employee … I could not have been happier when he opened the door. And, after his harrowing ordeal getting back to the U.S., he felt the same. We had a quiet family night Sunday after he arrived and then this week was just crazy at work and I got strep … go ahead and play the [sardonic] sad trombone for me. I know people have it way worse but sometimes the weight of the world just feels like it’s on your shoulders and you need to have a good cry.

Which I did. And damn, it felt good!

On top of all that drama, Maya is at that lovely phase where she is ridiculously cute and fun and learning new things every day. She loves to wow us — “singing” songs, counting to ten in English and Spanish, attempting to sing her ABCs, playing matching games with cards and getting them [mostly all] right, getting better at identifying letters, having real “conversations” … but she is also two and every other thing we ask her, we get a resounding “NO” in response. Which isn’t much fun. And she can tell when she’s disappointed us. She sees it on our faces and has been really into emotions lately. So she says, “Daddy sad. Mommy sad.” And then she comes running over and gives us this cheeky smile and there’s no way we can avoid cracking a grin back at her … even though she might have frustrated us.

While I wouldn’t trade it for a world, being a mom can be really tough sometimes. There’s no manual … just intuition. Kids will amaze you, inspire you … and frustrate you. And there’s no promotion or raise when things go great … you just have to believe it’s all good … keep pushing on, hoping you’re doing a good job and trusting that you are. Sometimes you’ll doubt yourself — your choices, your actions, your responses to situations …

Which brings me to this article a friend shared with me. I’ve blogged before about judgment among mothers and there has been lots written about the mommy wars — real or imagined. But this article, Friendly Fire, really hit home. And I don’t think you have to be a mom to find value in this piece; I know even before I became a mom I’d formed opinions about what I would do in XYZ situation. And that’s why I recommend it to all women — moms or not.

Because the last line really sums it up best.

“… So, maybe instead of tearing each other up, we could each admit that we’re a bit torn up about our choices, or lack thereof. And we could offer each other a shoulder or a hand. And then maybe our girls would see what it really means to be a woman.”

How true is that?!!

And on that note … my little one just woke up from her nap and the silence I was enjoying for the past couple hours has officially ended … replaced with sweet toddler giggles and crib chatter with her “friends” … is there anything better?! I think not.

I might not be a perfect mom or a perfect wife, but I am Maya’s mommy and Luis’s wife … and that’s pretty awesome!

Back to regular blogging next week.

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