I know I said I wouldn’t talk numbers often, but trust me, it’s relevant here. This is how I know I’m in a good place:
1) I weighed myself this AM and am up a full pound since last week’s WI (for a total of 3.8 lbs — I’m almost 17 weeks along, for perspective) … and I was *excited* to see the numbers matching my growing (albeit small-for-now) belly! A year ago I definitely would NOT have been able to see the numbers consistently go up and accept it, especially when I’m exercising and eating the same.
2) I tried on a pair of my usual size khaki capris … and they didn’t even come close to buttoning and looked horrible … and I simply put them away and slipped on a comfortable maternity denim skirt instead (which is loose-fitting but über-cute). Those pants will be there next summer for me to wear again; I know how to lose weight and have faith I’ll be able to lose baby weight as well when the time comes. But this is NOT the time to be concerned about that.
3) Two of my closest friends told me they could see my lil bump today … and I didn’t feel self-conscious in the slightest. If anything, it made me want to show it off, and I grinned from ear to ear upon hearing their comments. The old me would have been panicking at the thought of visible weight gain. Now, it’s expected and in a way, desired.
4) I haven’t made it to the gym in three days (you heard me — three days, no gym, hello!!); just been walking with my pup at night… and I feel like that’s enough and don’t feel the slightest bit guilty. I’m not eating like crazy so there’s no desire to “burn it off” and it’s been hotter than hell. Why push myself? I have someone else to think about right now. And tonight, I’ll be back at it and probably have a better workout as a result of some time off.
I’m sharing this today mostly for my own selfish reasons — because I know there will come a time throughout the next five months where I will not be feeling so rosy about all of this, and want to remember exactly how I feel now … so I can hold on to that feeling and channel it when I need it.
I’m not going to lie — yes, I’m still scared about my body being out of my control … but I’m also doing all the right things and taking good care of myself (though I have had Diet Coke now three times — oh well!) and that is what matters. I’m fueling my daughter’s life. THAT is what matters.
Hope you have a safe, happy and healthy weekend! We’re hosting my hubby’s birthday/citizenship fiesta tomorrow and I can’t wait! We love to entertain!!