I’ve been blogging for over a year now, so you’ve seen me through many ups and downs and everything in between.
One could argue blogging is a bit like airing your dirty laundry for the world to see. And in a way, it is.
But I like to think that by being open, honest and real — while raising awareness that disordered eating issues are real (and not something that just “poof” come and/or go) — that I might make a difference in some small way.
And your e-mails and comments (good or bad) reinforce what I’m doing each day has meaning. Plus, blogotherapy is working in the sense that I’m now four months chew/spit free?!
While at the beginning I was hesitant about spilling too much about myself, I’ve definitely become more open as my blog has grown and I’ve become more intricately involved in the blogging community.
Today, my Twitter and Facebook accounts both show my blog’s URL and my photo is up there — you might even notice I did some “house cleaning” on the right sidebar. (You can follow me on Twitter if you’d like … I came out of an 8-month Twitter hibernation just yesterday).
I realize these moves set me up for people I might not necessarily want knowing about my issues to know about them … but as an advocate, and in the name of transparency … I feel it’s my responsibility to be as honest as I can. And that means putting myself out there, however uncomfortable it might be.
(For example, people here in Michigan didn’t know me heavy (i.e., most of my life) so my “issues” likely would make no sense to them, save for a handful of close friends who know my situation and have been super-supportive.)
Putting myself out there means signing my real name when I write a guest column. It means realizing that when I Google my name or Lissa10279, my Brazen Careerist and Twitter accounts — both of which mention my blog — appear right away … or realizing that if I Google “disordered eater,” I rank #1 …
I don’t necessarily want to be known as a “recovering disordered eater” forever, but I have branded myself this way online, for better or for worse, and it’s something to which I might always be susceptible … but that hopefully I have the tools now to not engage in those behaviors, even when anxiety strikes.
I’m certainly not perfect, and I still struggle with over-exercising and emotional eating on and off … but I am proud of the progress I’ve made thus far, and owe a lot of it to you.
I didn’t like having to come clean in a post, to admit I’d stumbled upon a pebble or two … but I’m too damn honest to not share slip-ups and they make me real. That would be disingenuous to me; it would serve no purpose … We all know recovery from any addiction or ailment is not a straight and narrow path. So I’ve tried to be as “real” as possible.
While I still don’t use names of my friends or family out of respect to them (though I will say “friend,” “sister,” “husband”), I’m out there. And once you start blogging, there’s really no going back.
Fortunately, I’ve had nothing but support from my loved ones, but I know many people who have had to keep anonymity on their blog because they feared anyone discovering them.
Now that I’ll be contributing to WeAreTheRealDeal.com, I realize this opens me up for more criticism … but more importantly, offers more opportunities to get my message out there and get a dialogue going.
I’m really excited about it … and think it will be another positive step for me. Reading others’ opinions and broadening our reach as a collective group to incite and inspire change excites me. With varying opinions and various backgrounds, it’s going to be an interesting experiment … but one that could be life-changing.
And it’s something to which I’m thrilled to sign my name.
To quote MizFit, I’ll be “unapologetically myself.” We all will.
How about you? Do you blog anonymously? Are you comfortable with social media platforms or are you concerned about the risks being involved in them entails?
Let There Be Light 
Thank you for being so open and honest. I am new to blogging and do so anonymously at this point. But I have been reading your blog for a while and you are making a difference. Thank you for your openess and honesty.
Thanks, Smudge.
I must confess that I’m here for the first time and I think that making blog personal is what the whole bloggin idea is about. There is nothing more annoying for me than blogs made just to make money – without any spirit, real issues or posts that really matter. I like Your blog. Seems to be interesting for me.
Thanks, Tipsy. I’ve posted before about being asked to allow advertising here (and hello, I work in digital advertising!) but it’s just not the way I want my blog structured. Thanks and come back again!
I’ve said it before but the best thing about your blog is your honesty 🙂 I have some visibility issues, with not everyone in my life knowing about my blog. I can relate to the twitter/facebook thoughts so I admire that you have “come out” so to speak 😉
Thanks, Lara!
I always enjoy your blog and appreciate your honesty.
Keep it up!
I think it is brave and honest to be so open with your blog. I know for most people that have E.D. or D.E. think of it as a dirty secret. I know I didn’t tell anyone about my flirtation with an E.D. (only for 3 months) but even still I didn’t tell anyone except my best friend until years later. I was lucky that I stopped when I did because I was out of control. For you to step out and be so honest about your life and who you are makes what you say more poinant. It gives more validity to what you speak about. It gives your words more power. I read a pro-ana blog because I had read your entry about them. It was written by an anonymous person. This makes me wonder if it is really an anorexic person writing this. She says how proud she is but how can she be if she won’t show her face or admit her name. I only read blogs that people don’t hide on. If someone comes to this blog and sees how open and honest you are about what you are going through I think they are more likely to read and keep coming back because you are a real person out there. Thank you for your honesty and for being so open.
Thanks, Alis!
You’re very brave for putting your struggles out there. Hopefully it will encourage others to break free from the cycle. I have started a blog, and I try to be transparent. I even posted before and after pics. Blogotherapy is the best kind, cuz it’s free 😉
Thank you, Amani!
lissa im sipping chamomile tea and the tag on the tea bag says “By honoring your words, you are honored.” you are SO honored! you put yourself out “there” and live your words, good and bad.
we live in a society of shame and hiding, especially with issues like ED and DE, so to open up like you do is something special and real and helpful to so many. you inspired me to attempt opening myself as well, and i started my own blog.
its scary, i know. many of my followers are my yoga students. i have my blog totally available for any of my photography clients to read. i have no idea if potential clients have been turned off. my view is that, if someone doesn’t want to interact with me because of my truths, then it is better that way. i’ve caused damage to myself by thinking that the “grass is greener” when really it often isnt…so i strive to be an open book, which i guess could be the “extreme” end of the spectrum.
i hope my openness doesn’t slap me in the face someday, but if it does, at least i can still say, i’m honest. 🙂
Love it, Clare!
lissa im sipping chamomile tea and the tag on the tea bag says “By honoring your words, you are honored.” you are SO honored! you put yourself out “there” and live your words, good and bad.
we live in a society of shame and hiding, especially with issues like ED and DE, so to open up like you do is something special and real and helpful to so many. you inspired me to attempt opening myself as well, and i started my own blog.
its scary, i know. many of my followers are my yoga students. i have my blog totally available for any of my photography clients to read. i have no idea if potential clients have been turned off. my view is that, if someone doesn’t want to interact with me because of my truths, then it is better that way. i’ve caused damage to myself by thinking that the “grass is greener” when really it often isnt…so i strive to be an open book, which i guess could be the “extreme” end of the spectrum.
i hope my openness doesn’t slap me in the face someday, but if it does, at least i can still say, i’m honest. 🙂